What the Heck is a Fuckydamn?

My girlfriend and I have a relationship like no other. It transcends all.

We both inappropriate laugh at other people, not each other. We have our own language and codes. I'm the only one who can tell her things and she doesn't explode, and visa-versa. We quote from TV shows and movies. We watch trashy TV. No judgment. She took a photo of me in my bathing suit as an incentive to diet. NO one sees me in my bathing suit. It's just different.

One day while she was in a funk, Grey's Anatomy had a scene where Christina is trying to describe her relationship with Meredith to Burke. She could only sum it up by saying "She my person". When questioned even further, she said "She's the person I call to help me hide the body". So my friend Delisa texts me and says "You are my person." We both got it.

The same week of the Grey's Anatomy episode, I received an email from a very angry Chinese woman. She was dating my ex-fiance in China. I'm not very familiar with the Chinese culture, but this woman had been trying to befriend me. I thought of it as international stalking, by my ex said it was just 'cultural'. She had demanded that he give her all his passwords to his computer (which he did). She changed his myspace page to only have pictures of her and she deleted everything on his page wrote of his devotion and love for only her. Did I mention she was engaged to another man? Like I said, I don't get the culture.

She also had access to his email accounts and all of my email addresses. She therefore would email me 3 times for every one email she sent me. That pissed me off. Not to mention that she wanted to be added to my friends list on myspace and yahoo. I told him to tell her to leave me alone. I do not need any more psycho's in my life. He just laughed. But she read the email and he broke up with her. Not good for the yarn whore.

So I receive (three times mind you) this utterly pathetic email from her saying that, in essence, I was trying to sabotage their relationship and I had lied to him about her. She typed numerous times 'fucky damned'. I just laughed and found it very amusing.

So did my person.

So we merged the two together and we became each others "fucky damned person". Now it's just shortened to 'fucky damn'. Everyone should be so lucky to have a fucky damn. It's not even a cuss word anymore. It is what it is.

And ironically, we did hide a body together. And that's the least of the offenses we've done. But we do knit together and out of fuckydamnedness, she gave me some knitting magazines to get me through the rough time I'm having putting together my new notebook. I'm losing valuable knitting time over this.